Have you ever wondered what Jesus was like as a young man?  It’s not an easy question to answer --- both because he had two natures (human and divine) and the fact we don’t have anything written down about those early years --- no testimony from those who knew him as he “grew in wisdom and age”.  Theologians sometimes wonder about these things too --- like to try to imagine how Jesus’ two natures manifested themselves at each step in his development.  What was the one year-old Jesus like?  What was he like at five or ten?  When did he, in His Human Nature, become aware of who he was and what His Divine mission would be?  Put another way --- what did he know and when did he know it?  Not easy questions.

With the exception of the story of the Finding in the Temple, our sacred texts (collectively) jump from a tiny baby in the manger (and his presentation in the temple), to the banks of the Jordan River, to the story we just heard --- his forty days in the desert.  Not one detail in-between is known to us, but it’s still kind of fun to wonder about.  But one thing seems pretty likely --- that the infant Jesus and the adult Jesus were vastly different in terms of their physical and mental capabilities.  Some sort of “growth” and “development” took place --- across a wide range of attributes and abilities and understandings.

I guess you could say that at some point Jesus became fully aware of who he was --- and at that point fully embraced the implications of his identity.

It’s easy to point to his baptism in the Jordan as that moment.  That makes perfect sense.  After all, his baptism was even accompanied by the descent of the Holy Spirit and a voice from the heavens.  Powerful stuff.   If he hadn’t known who he was up to that point, this event would have sealed it in his mind.  It’s possible that in that moment, everything he had been thinking and feeling and wondering about crystalized into a clear picture.  He was THE ONE.

But one could also argue that Jesus’ desert experience was (in a sense) the first “complete” outward manifestation of both his humanity and divinity --- his emerging self-realized identity.  This Jesus seems so laser-focused.  This Jesus seems secure in who he is.  This Jesus seems in complete control.  Confident.  Courageous.  Authoritative.  Peaceful.  Wise.  Unshaken.  And, of course, when he returned from this desert experience he immediately began his public ministry, immediately began embracing the work his Father was asking of him --- preaching, teaching, healing, forgiving, showing compassion, challenging people --- all in full view for the world to see.

This was no longer Jesus the infant, or the adolescent. 

This was Jesus the man, or rather the God-man --- ready to accept and fulfill his destiny.  His forty days in the desert had brought clarity --- cementing in his heart and mind precisely what he was to be about and what he was called to do.  We might not know exactly what Jesus knew and when he knew it, but from this moment forward it appears there was no doubt.

Lent started a few days ago, as you well know.  And this holy season is meant to mirror Jesus’ desert experience.  Like Jesus, we are called to use this time to withdraw from all the distractions of life and contemplate our place in the world, our place in God’s plan, our place in the kingdom.  And, the things that sometimes come to light when we look deep within can be difficult to face, difficult to admit. 

Yet, the purpose of this journey is not to make us feel bad about ourselves.  It’s so that (hopefully) we can emerge from these forty days as people created anew, people changed by the experience --- ready to embrace all that God asks of us.  Lent is meant to lead us to know and want to be the person God created us to be --- that is, a person ready to begin living the full, loving, meaningful life we were meant to be living all along.

Do we know who we are?  Do we know who we CAN be, who we are MEANT to be?

This realization of our true identity does not work like some sort of light-switch --- “off” one minute and “on” the next, in darkness one minute and in light the next.  Rather, it is a journey not unlike that of our Lord, unfolding little by little over a lifetime --- each day understanding a little more, seeing a little more clearly, trusting a little more deeply. 

And so, it’s ok if we don’t always know with certainty exactly who God wants us to be or what we are called to do.  But one thing is sure --- the person we are today is not the person we have to be tomorrow (or the next day or the next).  And the holy season of Lent can help us on this journey --- the journey of self-discovery that reveals the beauty within, the grace within, the possibility and potential within.

Do we truly want to know who we are?  And more importantly, do we really want to know the kind of person we can be (and begin becoming that person)?  A person who is loving.  And generous.  And forgiving.  And courageous.  And humble.  And trusting.  And hopeful.  And every other good thing.

That sure sounds like someone we already know.  So let’s spend this holy time contemplating all the ways we can be the person God has wanted us to be all along.